SAHM I AM: Cooking With Kids

One of the things I enjoy doing with my girls is cooking or more specifically baking. We love making all kinds of goodies together from cakes to cupcakes to cookies. Now I am sure some of you are thinking I am nuts for letting a 3 1/2 year old and 20 month old help me cook, but it can be so much fun for all of use. The girls enjoy doing something grown up with mommy and I love the one on one time. Plus it really instills a sense of pride in them when they see the finished product. So here are a few tips on making the process go smoothly.

We pull kitchen chairs up to the counter so both girls can easily see and help, this eliminates feeling left out since they can see all the action. I give each girl a child’s size plastic cup which they use to add ingredients. I then measure the ingredient out in my measuring cup first and add a bit to each of their cups. By giving them their own small amount of ingredients I know they can dump it in without spilling or if they do spill it is only a small amount not all of the ingredient. Of course I let them stir with their own spoon and if the item requires decorating they each get their own small container of frosting or whatever we are using to spread on themselves. Having special cooking aprons is another great idea to keep everyone clean.

As a mom I love hearing my kids talk about what they made and watching as they proudly explain to daddy how they made the cookies. I have fond memories of baking with my mom and still enjoy baking with her to this day and I hope I am starting the same great memories with my girls. Do you bake with your kids?

SAHM I AM: Mommy in Waiting

Well I have hit the final stretch of pregnancy number 3 and I am a mommy in waiting. While I wait I look around me at my life and my 2 kids and wonder how in the world I will take care of another. Moments like that can be overwhelming especially as a SAHM. Knowing your kids are with you all day depending on you for everything can make any sane person crazy. Then I remember  with a smile ( only now can I smile) the day my oldest daughter was fussy all day due to an un-discovered dairy allergy and I called my husband crying saying how would I ever handle more kids if I couldn’t handle one 2 week old baby. Or those first few days of adjustment to being home alone with 2 kids without any help and how unfit and overwhelmed I felt. Then I remember the day it all clicked and my life fell into a fabulous routine with one child and then with two. And I also remember how my husband and I wanted another child each and every time we were blessed with a new pregnancy. It’s so funny how we forget and how easily we can be scared by the magnitude of our job as parents.

It is a lot we are molding , shaping and caring for another human being who is dependent on us to do it right. But it is also amazing, wonderful, rewarding and humbling. So after baby number 3 arrives and I write the inevitable post about how overwhelmed I am remind me of this post and this bit of advice… this too shall pass and probably way too quickly! Our kids pass from stage to stage way too quickly and with each one will come new challenges and new joys… I can’t wait.

SAHM I AM: The Little Moments

This week I have been enjoying one of the major benefits of being a SAHM, witnessing all the little moments. My daughters have not done anything amazing or life changing this week but they have been pretty darn cute and I was there for all of it. Don’t get me wrong they have ornery moments as well but it’s the cute moments I am choosing to remember. This week imaginative play was taken to a whole new level by my 3 year old and I got to hear it all ( so cute!). I was listening to my girls play in the other room when I heard this conversation ” 3 yr DD – I’m the mommy and you’re the daddy and this our baby. 18 mo DD – Yeah 3 yr DD – How are you doing? Would like to take baby for a walk? 18 mo – yeah ” And on it went with them playing family and taking care of their baby. It was so cute and I got to hear and secretly watch it all. It’s the moments like these that really make all the frustrations worth it. I have been here for almost all of them and that is why I LOVE being a SAHM, it’s the best job anyone could ask for! I would love for you to share your favorite SAHM moment in the comments below.

SAHM I AM: Yes Mom vs. No Mom

YES!!!!!!!

As I have near the end of my pregnancy and my energy has dwindled I have started to feel like a really insufficient mom. We are not doing as many fun things or going as many places because everything just seems like too much. Just the other day I was lamenting to a friend how I felt like all I do is say no to my kids lately and  time out has become way too common. In hindsight I know the mischief is bread of boredom and the fact that I have become a No mom and the Yes mom in me got swallowed up in all the pregnancy swelling is a big contributing factor to the problem . Then I read my friend Kate from Momopoly’s fabulous post on how she decided to challenge herself to bring back the Yes mom in her. Kate is such a fabulous writer and mom and her perspective is just what I needed to kick myself into gear.

So this week I have decided to challenge myself to be a Yes mom, to find new ways that do not over stretch my limits to be that creative fun mom I was pre-pregnancy. I am going to say Yes to the little things that my kids want that will make life more enjoyable for them and me. I will not become a sucker and I have no intention of letting the rules go but when my kids ask for reasonable things I will say yes even if I don’t feel like it. So how about you, will you join me in becoming a Yes mom again? Bring on the crazy kid ideas, I am ready for some fun with my kids!

I am sharing this on Share Your Life Your Blog check it out:

SAHM I AM: All About the ‘tude

Usually when I think about attitude a sullen teenager or my sassy 3 year old come to mind but today I am referring to my own. As my oldest is coming into her own and letting her opinion be known I can get very frustrated. Letting her do things her own way ( which takes 5 times as long) can be really hard sometimes, especially if it is making me late. Recently I was talking with a mom friend about how some days it feels like she does things on purpose to make me crazy and my friend passed on some great wisdom. My friend has twins and she was having the problem that while she dressed one the other undressed. It seemed like a vicious cycle and was exasperating. Her mom laughed at the story and said isn’ t that great they are learning a new skill to take their cloths on and off by themselves. So that got me thinking about my attitude and the way I was perceiving my daughters actions. While the things my daughter does are still very frustrating if I look at it as her learning a new skill or fine tuning one it is much less frustrating. I find that the things that seemed like purposeful irritants are simply my child discovering her world.

Changing my attitude helped me to regain the joy and wonder of raising a 3 year old and instead of chalking it up to terrible twos and getting frustrated I try to appreciate these moments for what they are. My daughter is not making me late on purpose she is gaining independence. I have found that I am a happy mom when I look at things this way instead of a frazzled grouchy mom and I do not want to be that mom! Now not all things are a new skill some are definitely defiance but I am learning to differentiate the two and some days I do better than others.

SAHM I AM: The Woman Behind the Mom

This week  I realized I have worn my hair in a pulled back messy bun every day for the past 3 weeks except one and that is really pathetic. The one day I did my hair I wore this fabulous dress from Shabby Apple and went to church. I felt amazing and was in a much better mood which brings me to my point for today’s SAHM I AM ramblings: dressing for the job. There are a lot of perks to being a SAHM but sometime those benefits can weigh us down and hinder us from being the best we can be. I know personally until I am out of my pajamas I am a lazy mom. It’s like the day hasn’t started so I don’t really have to be productive. Once I shower, get dressed and feel ready to start the day I am so much more focused and productive. I think it is easy to dress in comfy casual cloths especially on days you aren’t leaving the house, but be careful. If you are like me you will fall into a rut and (gasp) those cloths may start making it out the door. Don’t get me wrong you need to dress appropriately according to what you are doing, for example a mini skirt  and high heels to chase a toddler at the park not a good idea. But cute blue jeans with a fun top, coordinated jewelry and functional but fashionable shoes PERFECT.

I think too many women lose the woman they were before being a mom and become a frumpy shell. I know it is because we have  no time for ourselves, believe me I know! But don’t forget about the woman inside the mom, get up 15 minutes earlier so you can actually select your outfit instead of throwing on the first thing you see. Don’t do it for anyone else but you because when you like the outward image you are projecting it reflects in all you do from your attitude on down.  And believe me your husband and even your kids will appreciate it.

SAHM I AM: The Battle of the Lists

I love “to do lists”, I have them going at all times and it helps me to feel organized. When my husband comes home I love to run through all the things I got done, it helps me to feel like I had an accomplished day. Recently another type of list was pointed out to me, it’s called a love list. The idea is to make a list at the end of the day listing all the moments that were opportunities of love that I took advantage of. Let me give you an example of what my love list may look like:

• read the same book 5 times to my kids
• packed my husbands lunch so he didn’t have to
• answered the question why repeatedly
• let my daughter put her shoes on the wrong feet and waited while she fixed them herself even though it made me late

Get the idea? So that brings me to the title pf this post battle of the lists. While I want very badly to judge the worth of my day by a love list I find myself constantly judging by my to do list. When I am focused on my to do list my kids suffer because I become irritable when they are just being kids and it prevents me from marking things off my list. With all the recent upheaval the to do list has been more important than normal and guess what? I do not like the mom I have become, instead of laughing at or enjoying my daughters attempts to understand the world in their crazy kid way I have been irritated with how it slowed my progress. So this post is my reminder to myself to get back to judging my day with a love list and not a to do list. I will be happier and so will my kids and then my husband will come home to a happy home not a frustrated one!

SAHM I AM: 2 Sides To Every Story

This week I have been reminded of how their are always 2 sides to everything and you can’t have it both ways. Let me give you some examples of what I mean. I am a very attached hands on parent, my kids are rarely with a babysitter and then it is family only. My kids will not go to sleep for anyone but me or my husband because we stay with them until they fall asleep. I do not believe in the cry it out method and have parented my kids accordingly. Now my 3 year old is asleep in 10-15 minutes with me just sitting in her room. and my  18 month old just transitioned to sharing a bed with her sister so I lay in bed until she is asleep ( until 2 weeks ago I rocked her to sleep). This style of parenting means I can not do things with my husband that will overlap with bedtime. 99% of the time I am completely ok with missing things and love the extra close bond I have with my girls, but there are times I wish my husband and I could go out more or to specific events that overlap bedtime. That is where the 2 sides come in, while I sometimes feel slightly resentful (only temporarily) when an opportunity is missed because of my kids the majority of the time I think it is worth it. Plus they are only young once.

So what brought all this to mind? Well I have had to say no to 2 great opportunities because I can not leave my kids overnight. I both feel like it would be too hard on them and too hard on me ( my pregnancy also factors in big time since I would be traveling). What am I talking about? Blogher and a trip to Boston courtesy of TJ Maxx. I was fortunate enough to have several companies offer to sponsor me to Blogher so would have gone for free and the TJ Maxx trip to headquarters is all expense paid too. But I am a mom first and a very pregnant one who has blood pressure issues too. So this week as much as it KILLED ME to say no to TJ Maxx ( as you know I LOVE TJ Maxx and the chance to visit corporate plus see beautiful Boston how fabulous!) I did. I did it because of my parenting choice and my lifestyle choice as a mom of a growing family and 2 young kids, it just made it too stressful to do. As hard as it was, it was easy too because I have chosen to parent this way. Some would say my kids are overly attached, but some day they will go on their way and I will look back and smile thinking of the nights we snuggled in bed and my girls kept kissing me over and over as a game to keep themselves awake and that memory will overshadow the one of dinner out with friends. More importantly my choice to give my all to my girls doesn’t mean I deprive myself of adult activities it just means we are more creative about it. My husband and I go out early or late just not both and that works for us. It doesn’t work for everyone, but for my family it works just great. ( A big thanks to TJ Maxx and the companies who offered to send me to Blogher I am sad to not get to meet all my great blogging friends but I am sure we will someday!)

SAHM I AM: Not for the Wimpy

It’s funny often on TV or in movies SAHM’s are portrayed in a glamorous, stress free, social life. While my life can be all of those things they are not the majority of my days. In my world I take being a SAHM seriously and the job of raising my kids and running a home comes with a long list of do’s and don’ts. At the top of my list is my kids, making sure they are intellectually and socially stimulated everyday. Planning activities at home and searching out activities in our community. Setting  up play dates, finding unique ways to teach concepts and planning nutritional meals. Yes my play dates are with other moms whose company I enjoy but let me tell you as my kids hit the preschool stage I get to do less socializing with my friends and more monitoring and refereeing.

I also need to make sure my attention is focused on my kids, after all they are the reason I stay home. I want them to be attended to and to make sure they are getting all the benefits of having a mom at home. This also means that I must juggle giving my kids the attention they need and running a house. Now I admit the first thing to go in this equation is cleaning the house and laundry. Those thing get pushed aside in order to go on an outing or attend a class. But eventually they get done and your kids are only little once right?

So why do I say being a SAHM is not for the wimpy? Well because after you run yourself ragged to make sure your child is getting everything they need to thrive no one pats you on the back and says good job, you will not get a raise or an award, but you will get a hug and support from your spouse (hopefully) and other moms. Sometimes that is more than enough, but on those tough days when being a mom can be really hard it is easy to wish for the corporate world and it’s reward system. That is why it is SO important to have a spouse and friends who support your role. Yes their are days I want to scream ” you don’t pay me enough for this” but most of the time just being with my kids and the close bond that we have is enough.

( BTW I talked about adding a Mr.Linky if anyone wants to participate let me know and I will add one)

SAHM I Am

I know I promised a new series all about being a SAHM and then last week didn’t post, sorry about that last Saturday was the big moving day. So on to the topic at hand. I guess I will begin with why I am a SAHM. I have always wanted a family and being a SAHM has always been my priority. I know it is not for everyone and can be hard in a world that is based on dual incomes. But when I became pregnant with my first child one month after getting married my husband and I decided  we would make it work no matter what. Well there have definitely been some major financial struggles and we do not live a glamorous lifestyle but I wouldn’t trade a minute of it. I have been home for every first for both of my girls, I have gotten to teach them about the world and they have taught me even more. I have also been pushed to my limits and challenged in ways I never knew possible. Couponing and this blog have helped me to stretch our budget and so has creativity.

When I decided to be a SAHM my husband and I did not take finances into account, I know it sounds crazy but we made a lifestyle decision over a financial decision. To us me being home with our kids was the most important thing and we would make sacrifices in other areas to make it work. So here we are 4 years later and number 3 on the way. I am still  a SAHM and no matter how tight money has gotten that has not changed. My husband works hard and does what it takes to provide an amazing life for us. We don’t drive new cars or go on fancy vacations but the reward of being home with my girls is more than enough compensation. So that is my becoming a SAHM story in a nut shell. Check back next week for more thoughts on being a SAHM.

SAHM I AM

I am a SAHM ( stay at home mom) and I love it, well most of the time. After some recent conversations I have had with friends I have decided to start a series called SAHM I AM all about being a SAHM and keeping my sanity. I will post thoughts, tips and even problems I need help with as a SAHM For example “How do you get anything done with a toddler?” So want to join in the fun? Here’s how it will work each Saturday I will post my SAHM I AM post with a Mr.Linky. You post yours anytime that week and just linkup on Saturday so we can all help each other stay sane while tackling the noble, complicated, wonderful and challenging profession called SAHM. So are you with me?

I will even make a fancy button too, can’t wait to begin see you next Saturday with your great SAHM posts!